True happiness? It is a choice laying within!

This is an interesting theme to be writing about as in my work as a coach I have heard so many statements with these little words “happiness” and “happy”:

• ”Only when this scale tells me I’m 60kgs (9st6lb), I’ll be happy”.
• “If I go vegan, I’ll be happy”.
• “If my husband (or wife) loves me, I’ll be happy”.
• “If I earn so much money, I’ll be happy”.
• “If she apologizes, I’ll be happy”.
• “When my son starts to work and leaves, I’ll be happy”.
• “If you do as I think you should, I’ll be happy”.
• “If you say I’m right/tall/beautiful/thin/well-dressed… then and only then I’ll be happy”.
• …

Actually these things can give people a momentary sense of happiness but at the same time it is vulnerable, ephemeral.

 

Can you feel the sense of needing on the previous statements?

 

“I NEED to be 60kgs”, “I NEED to go vegan”, “I NEED to be loved”, “I NEED money”, “I NEED them to behave so and so…”, etc. So this deep sense of needing itself generally is the antithesis to real, long-lasting, sustainable happiness as it is based on external factors, on external deeds and behaviours… on things, situations, people and on a time (normally the future) outside of our control.

At my workshops I teach a happiness formula that I want to share with you today, it looks simple and at the same time it encloses a strong commitment with self-awareness, personal change and understanding the concept behind empowerment. Here it is:

 

Happiness = F(sF)² + EWB + PM! + ∞ Gr + C³ + | Comp. |

 

• F(sF)² – Forgive and more importantly, Forgive Yourself. Forgiveness is an act of Love that can inspire deep personal change, and above all make peace, freedom and happiness possible,
• EWB – Energy to act and seek Well-Being in every decision you make (instead of using willpower), the phrase “no pain, no gain” is just the belief of people who have suffered to get what they wanted, it doesn’t have to be your reality,
• PM! – Live and enjoy flowing in the Present Moment, there is no other time! The past is information that your memory holds and the future is virtual, it does not exist except in how you visualize it,
• ∞ Gr – Develop an attitude of gratitude for the opportunities life gives you. You stop being a victim of events when you start to be grateful for all the opportunities life gives you to learn, overcome and integrate what you experience is giving you,
• C³ – Be coherent whenever possible. Allow what you do to be in harmony with what you think and feel, this leads you to a state of health, happiness and peace. Obviously to introduce more coherence into your life, realize what you need to change and act accordingly,
• | Comp. | – Compassion, and not pity, based on feelings such as affection, friendship, empathy, sympathy or Love allows us to practice selfless altruism. Out of compassion we realize that we are accompanied, that we are a great community. Acting from true compassion brings us peace, joy and happiness.

 

 

Christopher McCandless, told us that “happiness (is) only real when shared”, and I would add that in order to be shared there is first the choice of feeling it and then the detachment of needing to share it, or that will be a source of unhappiness on itself…

Go! Be happy and share it with others without needing to.

 

Marco Silva

Coaching and Bioneuroemoción®

Would you like to know more on how to introduce more happiness in your life?

Contact Marco Silva on:

WhatsApp: +34 690 134 416

Email: marcosilva@factorvida.es

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